Secrets to Success

Why the New DNC Chairman Will be Irrelevant

By Andrew R Quinio
Posted on 01/29/05

I have always been a strong believer in the adage, “To be successful, one must surround himself with successful people.” If I had it my way, I would be friends with a high-power attorney, a self-made multimillionaire, a Rhodes Scholar, and Karl Rove. So far, none of the aforementioned has returned my calls.

What if these were my friends: Barbara Boxer, Martin Sheen, Michael Moore, Teddy Kennedy, and John Kerry? Indeed, they are successful in their own right, but together, I would only hang out with the combined group wearing dark sunglasses and a hood over my head. They are, as Arnold would say, losers. So what difference would it make if a new head honcho led these misfits? Absolutely none.

Pundits are saying that DNC chairperson election could decide the future of the party. The only thing it will decide is which name they will have to print on the new stationary. Howard Dean is in the contest, along with Reps. Tim Roemer of Indiana and Martin Frost of Texas; former Denver Mayor Wellington Webb; Simon Rosenberg, head of the centrist New Democratic Network; former Ohio Democratic state chairman David Leland; and Donnie Fowler, a veteran Democratic activist. The amount of hype surrounding the process is unnecessary. It does not matter who is the head of the Democratic Party. Whoever leads the losers will be associated with the losers, whether he likes it or not. The most outspoken and prominent members of the Democratic Party will lead the party to disaster, no matter who is in charge of the DNC. The Democratic Party does not need a change in managment; they need mass layoffs.

America agrees with the values of the Republican Party. Those who don’t think so still find Dan Rather to be a fair journalist. With that in mind, it would be detrimental to let loudmouth Democrats spew their out-of-touch rhetoric in front of Bush country.

Celebrity liberals sponsored an ad in Variety Magazine that urges Governor Schwarzenegger to approve a bill that would give drivers licenses to undocumented immigrants. One of the more predictable sponsors was Martin Sheen. We all remember him for protesting the Iraq war by carrying a cross and taping his mouth shut. The self-anointed Jesus later told a Canadian audience, “Every time I cross this border I feel like I've left the land of lunatics.” That’s a good way to make friends in America, or persuade American voters.

Martin Sheen isn’t running for any office, but he certainly is not running away from the Democratic Party or any of its candidates. One cannot help but associate a liberal candidate with the TV president, or any other celebrity shill. Indeed, guilt by association is a fallacy, but mere association is enough to make a party simply look bad.

The Party cannot succeed with Michael Moore in its ranks either. A mockumentarian that thinks there “is no terrorist threat” and says Americans are the “dumbest people in the planet” is unfashionable for the party apparel. Let’s see the new DNC chairman stop him. The party won’t stop Moore because they love him. Michael Moore is not seeking the favor of the Democratic party. It is the Democrats who long to rub elbows with the big, fat liar. They flock to his half-truths and accept it as gospel.

Immediate past chair Terry McAuliffe and several other prominent Democrats attended a special screening of Fahrenheit 911. McAuliffe described, “very powerful, much more powerful than I thought it would be.” That’s what I said about Harold and Kumar goes to white castle, and even that had more compelling political implication than Moore’s home movie.

After presenting legislation to reject the electoral votes in Ohio, A member of the all Democrat Congressional Black Caucus praised Michael Moore during a press conference. They gave Moore a special invitation in 2004 to address the CBC members. If they really want to win, they should dump Moore.

Ranking Democratic Senators are making the party look bad too (which is easy enough as it is), and a Chairman Dean or a Chairman Roemer will not be able to do anything about that. And now Barbara Boxer is making the party look even better. Her bitter verbal attack on now Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice didn’t win the hearts and minds of those in fly-over country. John Kerry’s nay vote against Rice was visibly tainted with sour grapes, and most people knew it.

Ted Kennedy continued his Iraq-is-Vietnam tour by remarking that The United States cannot defeat insurgents in Iraq. He also claimed that the US military is part of the problem, not the solution. As usual, Democratic leadership did nothing to stop Kennedy from aiding and abetting the enemy.

Republicans are always censuring their own members, even when they shouldn’t be in trouble. Trent Lott was martyred because of comments blown out of proportion by the ultra-sensitive left.

Simple reorganization of the party won’t do any good as long as Boxer, Sheen, and the rest are free to run around complaining and whining. In politics, success means surrounding one’s self with likeable candidates. For Republicans to be successful, they have to make sure the other party is surrounded by unlikable people. So far, success smells oh so sweet.

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